Okay, that's enough.

Yeah, last week's weigh in was great... a little weight loss was enough for me. I'm not looking for miracles here. But today, I am at 201. That's 2.5 more than last week. I know it's been a tough week - we had a potluck at lunch Friday, I ate too much Thai food last night, and Sonic for lunch and pizza for dinner Saturday was not a good idea either. But I was still really frustrated this morning when I stepped on the scale.

The worst thing about my weight is that my clothes are not fitting well. I refuse to go buy more pants unless the ones I have become to large. That means that I will be going to work in uncomfortable, ill-fitting clothes until I drop about 10 pounds.

All that said, I did make a few good choices today:

• Spinach salad for lunch.
• Yogurt for a snack instead of the crunchy granola bar or M&M's that were also available.
• Tea for a drink at work instead of soda.
• Plate full of fresh fruit and veggies with a Thai summer roll for dinner, also with tea.
• Went to the store when I was hungry and didn't pick up a candy bar or any junk food.

I don't know what is keeping me from being able to stick to my guns when it comes to meals. I know when I am overeating that I should have put less on my plate, or that I could have made a different choice, but it's like I constantly feel I deserve to reward myself. I need to come up with another reward besides food. Or remind myself that a bag of Doritos are not a good trade for smaller clothes, better health, and longer life.

I'm weak. But I have a solution!

Dear glass of amber liquid...
Cooled so gently by ice.
Refreshing,
Energizing,
Just plain perfect.
You are my weakness,
But I will triumph in spite of you!


Yep, there's a glass of Coke sitting on my desk right now, what of it?? Don't be a hater!

Okay, reality is a bitch. (Some say that about Karma, but I've found Karma to be pretty easy-going) Reality taps me on the shoulder and says "um... yeah, you have to update your blog, and you said you were going to be strong and all that crap. What gives??" And then she smirks at me too. So, I have to be honest and all that, and let you know that it's hard to stick to your weight-loss goals! I know this comes as a shock.

The best way to deal is to offer a lesson, so here I go. I may not look like Jillian, but I can teach you something! A standard Coke is 140 empty calories in a glass. My plans, as stated in my first post, are to be attentive to my intake, and make choices that will help balance the intake with activity. So, if I want to erase those 140 calories from my diet today, what could I do? I did a little search online, and found this website that lists a ton of different activities - both recreational and occupational - and lets you calculate the calories burned in an amount of time that you plug in. I don't have a lot of free time, so I looked at what I could do for 30 minutes to get rid of the demon on my desk...

I can burn 132 calories by doing one of these:  Frisbee, bowling, miniature golf, weight lifting, water volleyball, ballroom dancing, or cleaning house. 

Or I could bump it up to 155 calories by doing one of these: Hang gliding, sky diving, playing golf (using cart), trimming shrubs w/ power tools, vacuuming, carpentry work, bathing my dog, or archery (non hunting).

Or maybe I'll just go all out for 30 minutes, and do one of these to kick 177 calories off my intake today: Ping pong, Tai Chi, water aerobics, hacky sack, gymnastics, playing w/ kids (moderate effort), gardening, horseback riding, or motor cross.

Quite a selection, right? And I don't want to hear any laughing - I know some of you have hacky sack balls in that drawer in the laundry room that holds all your random crap... tape, mis-matched screws, flashlight bulbs, zip-ties, and hacky sack balls. My personal fave on the list is the "moderate effort" allowed while playing with the kids. Goes without saying that there are some days when even moderate is too extreme for me.

My point (thought I didn't have one, didn't you!) is that the key, as I've said before, is balance. Balance the good with the bad, in with out, up with down... you get the idea. I'm going to spend 30 minutes this evening getting some laundry done, picking up living areas and vacuuming. I'm fairly certain that the level of activity will burn off enough calories to make me feel okay about this Coke.

What do you do when you need to get up off your butt? What activities do you think you could add to your week to help put more things on the scale to balance the weaknesses you have?

Get thee behind me saute pan!!

Okay, I'm not really ditching my saute pan... I'm not completely crazy. But it sounded good, right? The demonization of saute pans is not something I would be surprised to see in some of the "eating light" magazines on the market...

But I'm not here to demonize anything in particular. Or even to chronicle my "diet" (because I'm not going on a diet). I'm just going to make some serious changes this year in the way I interact with food. I'm going to be more conscientious about my intake, and make decisions about my meals and snacks that are based on whether or not I'm hungry (there's a novel idea) and whether or not the food I'm choosing is the healthiest option available.

I know what you're thinking. "But Laurie... sometimes I don't WANT the healthiest option." And you're right - sometimes it's a birthday party, and there is cake and ice cream. And sometimes there's a road trip and a 44 oz. drink and a paper boat full of chili cheese dog is required every bit as much as a cd player playing Under the Table and Dreaming...  BUT (or should I say BUTT) that is a choice that has to be dealt with. If I go for the chili cheese dog and 44 oz. soda - it's salad for dinner and an extra 30 minutes on the walk or the treadmill. That's what my world is going to be like from here out.

In this (new) blog of mine, I will not be focusing on how to make your favorite fattening foods non-fattening, or how to live life sans Sonic and Taco Bueno. Life would not be worth living without the 2-4pm happy hour and Taco Bueno's tamales! Instead, I'm going to focus on how to live live life - a HEALTHY life - with those things included. More activity, less refined sugar. More veggies, smaller portions. Stuff like that. Follow along if you like, and feel free to share with the class if you have a success story of your own, or some tips for slimming down and firming up and living healthier. I'm going to also be using the word "healthy" a lot... because that's what it's about for me. Not a size or shape, but my health.

And, here's where I sound like a hypocrite: the reason I'm starting this journey is because I looked at the scale recently and finally saw the number I refuse to accept. 200. I weigh two hundred pounds. I know there are a lot of people out there who way a lot more than I do (except Oprah, who weighs the same) - and I am also aware that I'm fortunate to have a body-type that allows me to carry a lot of weight without looking too out of proportion. But that number, and a couple of pictures of myself that have surfaced lately, have pushed me to the limit. This one is from the summer of 2008, when I was around 195. I'm in my 40s, I have a 5 year-old I would like to see grow up, and it only gets harder to get in shape from here. So, today's the day.

First steps I've taken this week:
Signed up for the online version of Weight Watchers. It's only $17.95 a month (and there's a special going on right now!) and they offer a tremendous amount of information on living healthy. I'm tracking my points there as a way to keep a kind of food journal, and am logging my weight each week. I'll also look there for recipes. If I find good ones I'll share. :)

Cut out colas. This is REALLY hard for me, even though when I had them it was usually only one 20 oz a day, sometimes not even that. But I still want to switch to tea or water in order to cut out the sodium and sugar and, in the case of the diets, the artificial sweeteners. Soda just isn't "natural", and I don't need it.

Now I need to start putting more physical activity in my routine... that's next on the list.